Entry 2 - The Next Day

April 23rd, 2025

I began to write three paragraphs, until I reread what I wrote and decided to write from the beginning once again. Ok, practice time is over, now for the real deal.

In Entry 1, I wrote from a place of "recuperating" as I felt much frustration from how this season has been. You would think that this season has been fair to me, being that so many good things have happened, and you'd be right. But man, those frustrations bark louder than a dramatic husky.

Let's start with the negative, but let's also combat them with the positives.

1. Reworking the site has been a challenge for me, especially because ideas sound better on paper than they do in action.

"That's ok." Challenges are what provide outlets for growth. Should something not work out 100% the way we'd like it to, we (and I am referring to anyone here) can create an alternate idea that will be better than the original idea. If that idea is something that is worth going back to, there is always time to study and re-educate on the methods needed for that idea to function and grow. When it comes to making a portfolio, I believe the first few are going to have their flaws, but those flaws can indeed be eradicated or reduced significantly through practice.

So, here's the thing:

Let's get the media up here first, then the aesthetics are going to be worked on later. Whoever needs to see the media produced will see the material you have worked on FIRST, then the materialistic aesthetics. But yes, make the site look nice when you can.

2. I am not hearing a YES from anyone, not even *Insert generic company brand (because I am not trying to catch a fade from anyone).

"Ok, and?" That shouldn't stop you from constantly applying, organizing your material, and taking (positive) advantage of the blessings you have already been given. God gave you a little for now, so do well with that little as God prepares you for the abundance later. I saw a TikTok a few weeks ago that said this:

"When God tells you to wait, what you need to do is what waiters do and SERVE."

First off, SLAY QUEEN FOR THE WORD, I'M RECEIVING THE MESSAGE AMEN.

Second off, there is truth in the matter. For the past three weeks, I haven't been spending cash frugally. Somehow, all those tips have increased substantially and could pay off debts I didn't even consider paying for through those tips. Which leads to saved cash for bigger goals at the end of the line. As I am waiting, I am earning; as I am earning, I am saving; as I am saving, I am receiving.

Do ya'll catch my drift?

Finally, the thing I fear the most:

3. What if I am not cut out to be a creative? What if I am going to be stuck at a 9-5 job, knowing I could've done something with my life?

   "Okay, do what God (essentially) told Elijah. Sleep, eat something, and take care of yourself." There are nights when that is the best thing to do. The next day will play out the way it needs to, and a fresh perspective will arise. From my mouth, I need to remind myself of my journey so far:

   
   

"My name is Andre Ornelas, and I grew up wanting to be an animator. I couldn't draw well, but I went to school anyway to study to be a creative. I went to school and learned graphic design, photography, cinematography, and much more. Including the practicums of genuine art. Despite not being an animator, I have much more now than I did before. You can do this.

Yes, you have autism, but that hasn't prevented you from learning English and Portuguese, nor has it been a serious obstacle that prevents you from anything.

Life feels difficult, but difficult will become easier."

A couple of breaths later, and #3 is out of sight and mind.

Let's continue the navigation forward.